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Cracking nuts and toes

image Amidst my schedule that has been unbelievably busy recently I seem to have found myself with some free time. I've been heavily immersed in the world of ballet. I'm currently at a dress rehearsal for a show that I may or may not be dancing in. This is what we in the ballet call being an understudy. I already danced two performances last weekend but alas here I am again this weekend saying 'to dance or not to dance, that is the question.' It's amazing though the magic that happens in a theater and on a stage. When all the pieces come together the result is something that cannot be simply explained, it must be experienced.

Okay let me back up a little bit. Last time I posted was probably a good 2-3 weeks ago and I was just done with my first week of getting back into ballet classes. Well an amazing opportunity was presented to me after an injury occurred at a studio I took class at and here I am, having done two performances as their sugar plum fairy. I'm still only about 3 weeks into taking classes and the grand pas is HARD. Plus I'm in shock that this actually happened at all. I never imagined landing a role period let alone one line this... And so soon. That coupled with a few other complications and circumstances has my body begging for mercy. I had to learn the entire pas -a version I had never even seen before- in a week and be able to perform it. Talk about pressure... Then from crazy blisters, to dead point shoes, randomly swollen feet, uncomfortable nude leotards, stage makeup, brand new tights that ripped on stage and a slew of other factors this whole experience has been a whirlwind.

I've met a lot of great people, pushed myself in ways I did not foresee, and it's been great. It really has. There's been plenty of drama and discomfort that's gone along with all of it but I feel blessed. I had one performance that felt like a train wreak in which my my shoes died during the pas, and my tights literally caught on my partners costume on stage and ripped a big hole in my butt. But more importantly I felt incomplete, defeated, and disappointed in myself after the fact. I didn't feel elated, or even a little bit happy for having performed and survived. I knew I could do better which was frustrating but more importantly I also knew that I hadn't done well. But that second performance was magic.

Everything came together on stage. It still wasn't anywhere near perfect but with how out of shape I am, I was never expecting perfection. All things considered, this time I felt it. I felt the happiness, satisfaction, and a sense of accomplishment that I have been accustomed to feeling after performing. That feeling is what I'm doing all of this for. Life is a funny thing, it reveals its meaning to you when you least expect it.

Okay well I need to be ready to dance just in case so I should probably do that. Did I mention that this show is sold out?? Crazy right!? We'll see what happens, I'm fine whatever way this goes. My body would be relieved if I didn't have to dance, that's for sure... Well until next time...

Xoxo - Harmony

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Mysterious Ways

The line currently playing through my head over and over is from the new Ed Sheeran song Thinking Out Loud that says "I'm thinkin bout how people fall in love in mysterious ways, maybe with just the touch of a hand. Well me, I fall in love with you every single day...". There are so many lines in that song that I just LOVE. Plus his gorgeous voice and the melody. I've been listening to it nonstop. You should really go listen to it and watch the video because there are some seriously killer dance moves up in thurr as well. That's where today's title is from. And that's where I am today. It's kinda gloomy and rainy outside, I'm at work, and just loving this song. I really just LOVE it. #swoon When I listen to it I gets chills, and think about how lucky I am to have an amazing man in my life. We're coming up on our 5 YEAR marriage anniversary which is on Tuesday October 14th. Originally we wanted to take a trip at the end of October to celebrate but we put in our passport applications a bit too late so it looks like we'll be going early next year, maybe in January or February, we'll see! Regardless we have a long weekend coming up for Columbus Day and I'm excited to spend it with him doing something or other! I also might go to a winery with some of my work friends. Also it looks like I might be baby sitting my bestie's son. He's so cute, he makes me want a baby of my own. Like now. OH and I'm lucky enough to have been selected as a bridesmaid in my friend Lauren's wedding which is next weekend. So there's a lot of busyness coming up very soon. We are meeting this weekend to hash out some of those final details. I can be so mushy sometimes it blows my mind. Literally while driving in the car yesterday I was thinking about Lauren and David getting married, and just how happy I am for them and started crying a little. Not bad crying by any means. But just little happy tears. I really only get like this when I'm alone. I have trouble showing my softy touchy side when I'm around other people. Dunno why. Maybe a defense mechanism or something, who knows! But hot damn talk about silly girly crying. But I really am so happy for them. For realz.

Moving on...

Right now is that awkward 'in between' season where not ALL of your normal TV shows are back on but they're gradually making their way back into the screen through cable, hulu, netflix and otherwise. I watch a lot of shows so it's pretty exciting to see them all come back and actually have new episodes sitting in my hulu queue. Also over the past month or so I've watched an entire season of Supernatural, Psych, and almost the entire SERIES (season 1-7) of Californication. I'm not quite done with that one yet though, but still... Pretty impressive no? That's what I've been doing instead of blogging and cleaning...

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Also  football is in full swing and we've been going out to enjoy happy hour and watching the games a lot. OH and amazing cider discoveries at Total Wine- The Fall Harvest Woodchuck tastes just like Apple Pie! Yay for apple and squash season!

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The seasons are a changing! The color of the leaves are starting to change, kids are back in school, the future looks bright and gosh I have to wear a jacket outside! I LOVE autumn. I used to hate it... Like really I hated it because it meant that the weather was gonna start getting cold which is just yuck right? But what a pessimistic way of looking at a season. While I must admit that I still loathe the winter time and all the cold sadness it brings, I've learned to love and enjoy the in between time. I now appreciate so much about autumn. Cute autumn decor for my house, nice burgundy and rich orange colors, leather jackets, regular jackets and blazers, cute boots and scarfs… Gosh I mean the weather is beautiful! Lightly chilly but not freezing. We're not at winter hats and mittens yet (THANK GOD). This season reminds me of new beginnings. New and exciting things are to come. Time for change and forward progression. Life goes on. Summer ALWAYS ends and autumn always comes (at least if you live in this area).

Speaking of new beginnings a few personal notes on this topic:

1) I am back on track with my eating! YAY! I'm finally getting back to SUPER clean eating after a small break of not AS clean eating. Woop! I am back on the wagon ladies and gents.

2) I've been thinking a lot about my future... Doing research and contacting people in hopes of taking ballet classes again. I want to perform. I need to perform. In theory I'd like to join a small ballet company but first and foremost I need to get back into the studio for plain ol' class. It's been WAY TOO LONG and I miss it. I'm trying to make this happen but gosh it's so much harder than it sounds. Plus the thought of taking class literally gives me anxiety. I care WAY too much about what other people think.

3) I've been THINKING about partaking in a bikram yoga competition in January... The studio I attend Pure Om Fairfax is starting competition training... And gosh I'd be lying if I said I didn't want to give it a try. I din't expect to place, I know I'm not the best, but I still think it would be a fun and awesome challenge. But I worry SO much about people judging me. I worry about telling the instructors that I'm interested and maybe they will think I'm crazy for wanting to try. Maybe they'll call me out for not attending class often enough or not having a practice that's "regular" enough. I don't know... But it's swirling in my head!

4) I got a new piercing! I got my tragus pierced. My beautiful sister in law Johanna has had her's pierced for years. I wanted to get a cool funky piercing and after weighing my options I decided that I wanted to get it pierced too. And I apologized for copying her now years after the fact. The piercing place gave me $10 off my next piercing. I'm thinking of getting my cartilage re-pierced on the opposite ear (I had it done with a piercing gun last time instead of with a needle-TERRIBLE idea... It was infected nonstop) and getting the third hole on my left ear to match my right ear. You wanted all these details right? ANYWAY it's exciting. I haven't gotten anything pierced since my belly button and that was in 2008. So yeah. The day after I got my tragus pierced (which also in case you were wondering did not hurt very badly at all) it bled kind of a lot. But Google tells me that's normal and I'll be alright... Progression of the pics below from left to right... Minutes after getting it done, the day after, then bleeding the day after, and finally, TODAY...

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I have been cleaning the piercing twice daily, first with a warm epsom salt soak, than I spray with an organic raw apple cider vinegar and water mixture. 1 part ACV to 2 parts H2O should do. I didn't want to use anything unnatural on my ear and I think it's doing quite well!

5) I want to start this one off by saying that my husband Ernest pretty much hates tattoos. However, when our precious puppy Lulu was hit by a car at the young age of 2 and died a few years ago (it'll be 3 years on Jan 26th) he agreed that I could get a small one to commemorate her. There were other conditions to this as well, but I won't go into those! Long story short, I planned out a tiny paw print outline for my wrist but never went through with it. I have recently picked back up with the tattoo planning for my wrist but I'm thinking of going in a different direction. I loved my dog, and I will love the rest of the dogs I own (at least I sure as hell think I will) but I worry that a paw print tattoo- however meaningful- can be cheesy. Now if you have a paw print tattoo, please take no offense, I am just speaking for myself and my body. Because of this I have a lot of pressure to make this one tiny tattoo encompass all the meaning I need it to. Including love for my husband, my pets, my future children, myself, and this life... So I've been doodling and pinning. We'll see where it all goes! New beginnings right!

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6) My coworker (and friend) and I were looking into possible career growth plans and we are both sort of interested in contracts. I already do some work with contracts and she and I looked up a certificate program which got us both super excited! However, the excitement quickly dwindled for reasons I can't speak of in a public setting... But why do life and career choices have to be so damn hard sometimes? Blahh

7) Another of my friends and coworker's had pretty major surgery last week on the chest area and I (and many of her other close friends and family) was helping her with the recovery. It's pretty cool to help someone make their life better. Not that I really did ANYTHING but making the tough decision to make a big change to make yourself happier (wow I just said "make" way too many times). Inspiring no? It can be so hard to know what we want and to just get over our fears and go for it. She's super happy now and damn I think she was brave as hell. I hope to have the same bravery in different ways for myself...! Like the whole ballet and bikram thing I mentioned above...

8) My car was rear ended in July (see below) and I've been going to the chiropractor 3 times a week pretty much since then. I am so happy to say that today was my last day of therapy on my neck and shoulders! This feels like an accomplishment at this point. Lame I know, but it's something. Also my car is finally back in tip top shape. YAY! :)

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I suppose that's it for now really. I have some recipes to post for you my readers, and at some point and I promise I will get around to doing it.... At least eventually...! OH I should have my first Stitchfix waiting for me when I get home! I post about that more in detail later! If you actually take the time to read my ramblings, just know that I do in fact appreciate it...! I do! So thank you.

MUAH! Until we meet again.... Harmony

PS: READY FOR NATURALLY CLEAR SKIN & RENEWED CONFIDENCE?
Join hundreds of subscribers and get instant access to my resource library of ebooks, worksheets, and resources for acne sufferers & health seekers alike!